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Gholsie
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comment_1539141) You have more wings than a bucket of chicken!!!!
2) Your paint reflects more light than a road sign!!!
3) If you have more stickers than a mid 70's Trans-Am.
4) If you have a bigger exhaust than a semi.
5) If your camber is sooo bad only part of the tire that gets wear is the sidewall.
6) When you go by people start looking for killer bees.
7) If you rev your car to the limiter every time you are at a stop light or just stopped.
8) When your exhaust is made from a company called Folgers.
9) When you think your stickers give you an extra advantage in horsepower.
10) If your next mod involves neon lights.
11) If your "cold air intake" is located in the engine bay sucking in hot air.
12) If you have damage to your body kit because of your 20" rims.
13) You own a 350z and visit the 350z section of zcar.com to get good performance parts opinions.
14) Your mom used to drive you and your siblings to school in your "performance car."
15) You can't corner over 20 mph because your rims will scrub.
16) You take out the rear seat to save weight, then add 100 lbs of stereo equipment.
17) You have a video game system in your car.
18) Your car looks like a video game.
19) You have decals on your car in a foreign language and you have noidea what they say.
20) Librarians look at your rear spoiler in envy.
21) Your muffler has twice as many cubic inches as your engine!
22) You think horsepower is more important than torque.
23) You see something at NOPI, have no idea what it is, yet you must have it, because doodah has one.
24) When you have a rollcage installed in your 17 second Civic.
25) When you lower the rear of your car with a 250 lb wing.
26) When you have 3 boost gauges installed on the A pillar for your stock 0.5 litre sewing machine motor.
27) When you slap type R badges all over your ride and think its quicker.
28) When you have a 3/4 inch exhaust with an 8 in can in the back.
29) When your car is actually higher than stock ride height because of its 22 in rims.
30) When you think your ride is faster because you have green lights under your car.
31) If your body kit has more cracks than a plumber arse crack.
32) You sell cocaine for the image.
33) Whenever a Z guy mentions the name "Datsun" you think pickup truck.
34) You think you’re an import specialist because you hang around Asians.
35) When you say to people you have a high performance sports car and then you show them your Honda Civic.
36) When your IQ is smaller than your engine size in litres.
37) You might be a ricer when you install color matching spark plug wires and hoses.
38) You drive down the street and people have to check their lawn mowers to see if there running.
39) If twenty years from now, you look at pics of the cars you have present day and ask yourself "WTF was I thinking!"
40) If you take this too seriously............
41) Your tach is bigger than your head.
42) Your shift light can blind somebody.
43) You have a shift light on a vehicle with an automatic transmission.
44) You have more fog/driving lights than most Rally Racers
45) You have 1 Wiper because its "cool"
46) You always talk of the turbo conversion but it never seems to happen.
47) Oh and lets not forget about the type R, its badge alone increase your HP output by 10 in most ricer vehicles - Heaven forbid the actual engineering in a Type R.
48) You don't know the difference between understeer and oversteer.
49) Magazine ads for your "performance" car boast price, dependability, safety, and fuel economy, but not performance.
50) Your " performance" car is the cheapest car the manufacturer sells.
51) You have a big APC sticker on your car, anywhere on your car. And don't forget about the site www.anti-rice.com.
52) Your mods list includes stereo equipment, neon lights, and painted interior pieces but, no actual performance parts.
53) If your interior lighting glow sticks are brighter than your headlights.
54) If you have so many fog lights you have to buy another battery for them.
55) If people try to hire you to plow the snow from their driveways due to the bulldozing front air dam you added to your civic with the month's allowance.
56) If the only way you can do donuts is on a skid plate. (and it's under the rear wheels)
57) If your indiglo gauges blind the car behind you.
58) If you mount a double-deck spoiler on top of a factory spoiler.
59) If you join a car club because your base VW Jetta has a new, shiny, 5" MUFFLER!
60) Two wings are better than one
61) “I actually saw this POS tonight with one on the trunk and another on the roof Must be going for the convergent-divergent affect to create awesome downforce?”
62) a. If you take what they said on Fast & Furious as gospel.
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