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A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.

She says, "What's the story?".

He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor".

She asks, "How often do I have to do that ?".

------------------------------------------------

A gorgeous young red head goes into the doctor's office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it.

"Impossible" said the doctor. "Show me".

With her finger, the red head pushed on her left shoulder and screamed, then pushed on her elbow and screamed even more. she pushed her knee and screamed, then her ankle and screamed. everywhere she touched, ... she screamed.

The doctor said, "You're not REALLY a red head are you?".

"Well, no" she said, "I'm actually a blonde".

"I thought so", the doctor said, "Your finger is broken".

LOLLOLLOL

Rick.

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A Russian, an American and an English Blonde were talking.

The Russian said, "We were the first in space!!".

The American said, "We were the first on the moon!".

The English Blonde said, "So what? we're going to be the first on the sun!".

The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads.

"You can't land on the sun you idiot, you'll burn up!" said the russian.

To which the blonde replied, "We're NOT stupid you know, we're going at night!".

  • 3 weeks later...

Two casino dealers are at the craps table when a cute blonde comes over and says, "I want to bet twenty thousand dollars on a single roll of the dice. But, if you don't mind, I'd I feel much luckier if I were completely nude." They say fine, she strips naked from the neck down, and rolls the dice. Then she screams, "I won! I won!" She starts jumping up and down, hugs each of the dealers, and then picks up the money and her clothes and walks away. For a minute the two dealers stare at each other. Then the first one says, "What did she roll, anyway?" The second dealer says, "I don't know. I thought you were watching."

Edited by FastWoman

A blonde and a lawyer are seated next to each other on a flight from LA to NY. The lawyer asks if she would like to play a fun game? The blonde, tired, just wants to take a nap, politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The lawyer persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun. He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5.00, and vice versa. " Again, she declines and tries to get some sleep. The lawyer, now agitated, says, "Okay, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5.00, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500.00." This catches the blonde's attention and, figuring there will be no end to this torment unless she plays, agrees to the game. The lawyer asks the first question. "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?" The blonde doesn't say a word, reaches into her purse, pulls out a $5.00 bill and hands it to the lawyer. "Okay" says the lawyer, "your turn." She asks the lawyer, "What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four legs?" The lawyer, puzzled, takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references, no answer. He taps into the air phone with his modem and searches the net and the library of congress, no answer.

Frustrated, he sends e-mails to all his friends and coworkers, to no avail. After an hour, he wakes the blonde, and hands her $500.00. The blonde says, "Thank you," and turns back to get some more sleep. The lawyer, who is more than a little miffed, wakes the blonde and asks, "Well, what's the answer?" Without a word, the blonde reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5.00, and goes back to sleep.

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