Giving you the chance to back out before you get any further, following stuff contains foul language, if you don't like it, back out now, and don't come crying to me later. If not read and enjoy.

9 Things I hate about YOU

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for

the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the **** is

yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

2. People who are willing to get off their arse to search the

entire room for the tv remote because they refuse to walk to the tv and change the channel manually.

3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". ****ing right! What good is a cake if you can't eat it?

4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of

course it is. Why the **** would you keep looking after you've

found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?

5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No tosser, I paid $8 to come to the cinema and stare at the ****ing

floor.

6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?". Didn't really give me achoice there, did you sunshine?

7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an

improvement, then there must have been something before it.

8. When people say "life is short". What the ****?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever ****ing does!! What can you do

that's longer?

9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, nobhead!

Well what do you know, it gets the foul language edited out automatically, use your imagination the missing word starts with f and ends with uck, and its Not Fire Truck.

I think whoever wrote these had alot of anger but there still good.:classic:

:(

Maybe I'm old fashioned, (Well, I AM an oldie), I feel the use of bad language in a public place and/or within earshot of a lady shows a lack of manners, disrespect and pride in oneself. These Forums are Public Places and there are Ladies present.

There is absolutely no need to lower one's standards by using foul language. With only a little THOUGHT, anyone with even basic inteligence can find a reasonable substitute.

Believe me, when it comes to swearing, I can cuss with the best.

However, I use a little common sense as to where, when and how.

Other than that, my pet hate is;

"I just finished restoring my 260 Z". "Oh, you've finished it have you?".

Rick.

Point taken Rick, and I can even see where you are coming from however I have a few issues to take up with it. You were warned before you looked at it therefore it was totally your choice to look at it if you genuinely were offended by foul language or a group of stars, then you wouldn't have looked?

I also fail to see in how me swearing is disrespecting myself, but in future I will try and substitute all swearing something a little more imaginative.

Sorry for any offence caused by my post.

Chris

Like Bravo I would feel uneasy swearing around women, but for some reason women don't seem very hesitant to swear at me. With alot of the kids today, swearing has become almost unconscious and is not intended to offend, but some of us older farts(is fart a swear word?) are accustomed to a little less of the expletive action. Although I just used some in another post, so I'd better shut up. Victor.

I understand what 1Bravo6 is saying but I think Zkid did the right thing with warning us about the use of language.

Let's face it there's far worse things on the internet to be worried about.

The joke uses alot of profound language to make it's point but I guess it came down to the Author's lack of vocabulary to describe his emotions .

Anyway all that said both of you have a point and it is a bit of senseless fun.

I remember people complaing about the boobs post now that was fun :classic: .

The numbered statements are actually taken from a comedian's routine. Don't remember who the comedian is but I do recall seeing the video of it.

Where swearing and other uses of expletive language are commonly used in Stand Up Comedy, in written form they take on a different meaning and import.

To most of us who would agree that there's altogether too much use of "foul" language these days, we need to remember that to these people, OUR idea of FOUL language is not at all what they are used to. In fact, to us, it seems as though they CANNOT SPEAK without using expletives.

The main difference between this post and "Boobs" is that in "Boobs" you read the title, then read the post and warning THEN clicked to see a picture.

This post on the other hand, has the warning and the language on the same page AND in the same post.

Kind of like #6. "Would you like to see some Sh!t?" While holding up a double handful.

In fact, you can read the whole text posted, and simply ELIMINATE the expletive and the content does not change.

However, the assumption that we're all too stupid or naive to know what four asterisked word could be used in the edited / censored document, and then following it up by a phonics class on what the word was in an effort to see if it could be pushed past the sensors, is just simply childish.

Rick being serious?

Sometimes swearing can ruin a joke, and this is a good example. Number two was very funny, but three just became a little offensive.

But as Enrique said, it's a part of the 'humour'...

And I'd just like to say 'fart' was a swear word to me until a few years ago tanny, and it was as much as Chris could do to warn everyone about the topic. I think we should be thanking him rather than anything else.......

And hey, some of those were even funny

agree with the chris you were warned not to read if offended dont read just lighten up enjoy life i mean your never going to stop swearing its near acceptable part of the every day speech half the tv and moives you see have it

laugh enjoy things for what they are meant i bit of giggle long time dead

Mick

Originally posted by EScanlon

The numbered statements are actually taken from a comedian's routine. Don't remember who the comedian is but I do recall seeing the video of it.

It wouldn't be Andrew Dice Clay would it? Swearing is a major part of his ruitines.

Alfadog, you're right that swearing can often ruin a good joke but this is not one of those situations. The swearing adds to the feel of it, expressing this comedians anger and frustration and I bet he would raise his voice slightly with every swear word. But anyway...:cheeky:

Originally posted by zed240au

agree with the chris you were warned not to read if offended dont read just lighten up enjoy life i mean your never going to stop swearing its near acceptable part of the every day speech half the tv and moives you see have it

laugh enjoy things for what they are meant i bit of giggle long time dead

I'll hop quickly (and briefly) in on this one too. I agree that the warning should have been sufficient. From that warning, the easliy offended should have been averting their eyes (or hitting the "BACK" button on their web browser). The bad language was a bit of overkill (too many "F's"), but since it was lifted from a Standup comedy routine, that is to be expected.

Originally posted by EScanlon

Where swearing and other uses of expletive language are commonly used in Stand Up Comedy, in written form they take on a different meaning and import.

I disagree with this statement completely, but Enrique is welcome to his opinion. The same words mean THE SAME THING no matter where or how they are conveyed IMHO. But this doesn't mean they are always appropriate either.

Bottom lines for me are:

A) that this area is the Funnybone forum and y'all were warned.

there were enough "F's" to detract slightly from the humor about half way through the list..... but it was still funny.

Sorry, I couldn't shut up yet. *&^@$#!)*^++&&%$@^&**$%$%(*_)(^&^$@$#~(*&)(*&%$!#~$!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Take that everybody!! Victor.:cheeky: :classic:

Don't be laughin' now, this is serious excrement.