Her first REAL drive

[1 Bravo 6]

Until today, my "She who is always right even when she's wrong" had only driven "Precious" at a steady crawl that didn't even cause the speedo needle to vibrate while I hung on precariously while trying to locate some mysterious noise.

A local country school held a Country Fair today and had requested our car club to show off some of our cars.

Now, my "She who maintains to be a better driver than me" has NEVER had a decent drive of the Zed so, trying to earn a few brownie points, I handed her the keys and suggested that she drive home.

She followed my instructions regarding the use of the choke etc., selected "D" for drag and accelerated.

Now, "Precious" is rather touchy in the go pedal and we were parked on grass. Yep, you guessed it, in two seconds flat we'd left a zig zag twin trail of torn grass as we fish tailed across the paddock.

Did she panic ?????

Did she cry out in fright "Oh, gosh darn it". (Well, she IS a lady).

Did she slam on the brakes ?????

NO, she calmly brought the car under control, slowed as she turned onto the bitumen and took of like a flying fart in an outback dunny.

I'M MARRIED TO A BLOODY 58 YEAR OLD HOON.

I'm hiding the keys from now on.

Rick.

[Alfadog]

hehehehhehhee

ROFL

You better watch out, next thing she'll be out looking to buy one for herself! (is that a bad thing?)

[ozlime240z]

The other option of course is that she was completely oblivious to the fact she was spinning the wheels and had no idea what was going on, made no adjustments, and it all just happened to work out....

[tanny]

Man you're brave using the word "old" anywhere near the word "wife". Quickest way to get cut off, both figuratively and literally. 58 years "young". What is a hoon? Victor.

[Mike]

I love Australians.

[Z Kid]

Hey Victor, a hoon is a person who drives like they own the place, foot flat to the floor, tyres losing traction and frequently out of control (usually under the impression that they are cool seats often in the reclined position while driving). You average hoon is in my age group (16-21ish) usually driving a commonwhore, or some other equally as poorly made Aussie car, adorned with stickers like "Only milk and juice comes in 2 litres".

They all tend to end up in one of three places, body bag at a morgue, police station, or taking public transport after they lost their licence.

You must not confuse a hoon with a bogan, even though there are some similarities.

Hope this cleared it up a bit.

Chris

[Bambikiller240]

Originally posted by Z Kid

You must not confuse a hoon with a bogan, even though there are some similarities.

Hope this cleared it up a bit.

Chris

OK, I'll ask. What then is a bogan?

[Z Kid]

A bogan is the country boys equivelant of a hoon. Instead of driving round in sedans, they have old utes (trucks). The degree of boganism can be established form looking at their utes. Your full feral bogan will have a ute coated with B&S ball stickers, large roof mounted spotlights, a huge roobar, lowered, and where there are no B&S ball stickers, Rum stickers will be plastered. Often offensive cat stickers can often be found as well ("Lost your car check my tyres", "Cat the other white meat" and the odd cat tail hanging from the fuel filler door)

There are also immitation bogans which are city guys with the bogan utes (usually newer models).

These utes are used for hunting, rooting, ute surfing and a variety of other activities.

Bogan ute competitions are not an uncommon event.

See the attached pic for a mild bogan car.

[Bambikiller240]

Thanks for the pic. So, that one is a MILD one? Geez, I can't imagine what a hardcore bogan ute would look like!

[drunkenmaster]

OK, you asked for it:

http://www.uteman.com.au/gallery/gallerybrowse.asp?displayRows=3&displayCols=4&StartRec=0

http://www.utemuster.info/gallery.htm

[2ManyZs]

Guess we can enter those into our Septic/Ozzie dictionary huh?

Hoon= Ricer

Bogan= Redneck

[drunkenmaster]

nah, hoon is not a ricer....but could be.

think more dangerous and stupid public driving in more often then not a V8 or car pretending to be a V8.